photo credit Allyson Johnson
How a Boudoir Photoshoot Taught Me Self-Love
I heard so many do’s and don’ts as a child – we’re told how and what to do every day of our lives and the media….let’s face it, all those messages about ideals, morals, lifestyles, & values are conflicting each other at every turn.
I knew what the term ‘boudoir’ meant, sort of. It was one of “those things” that we are supposed to know about but shouldn’t really talk about in public because it’s something related to a sexual nature. I had a basic grasp that it was a risqué style of photography. Occasionally, an article or post would be in my newsfeed but I never gave any thought as to if it was something I would ever even consider for myself. I always thought, “What a great photo for them. How brave of them,” and my thumb would continue to scroll the page down because we’re taught that sex is dirty for women, lingerie is for you to wear for your husband, and selfies mean you’re self-centered and narcissistic
Over the past year I’ve been learning to listen to my intuition as a part of raising my self- awareness around being a woman. For some reason that intuitive nudge brought me to hitting ‘like’ on a Facebook page….joined a private Facebook group for that page…and watched a video about an opportunity for someone to earn a free boudoir photography session that would include a new product the photographer was launching – the boudoir video. I submitted an application and was chosen for the session. It’s a blur to look back at because I was focused on following the nudges and pulls, paying attention to the things that caught my attention and were able to hold it..
As I look at my photos from that session and watch the video she so beautifully made, even 3 months later, it brings tears to my eyes and it’s hard for me to believe that I am the woman I’m looking at. It breaks every stereotype, and society’s idea about what a proper woman “should and shouldn’t” do.
That experience (it truly is an experience, not just a headshot and a photo) showed me a new depth to myself – it allowed me to focus on ME for that day. Not mom, wife, daughter or business owner, truly me as the woman I am.
It was very grounding for me to see myself as sexy, beautiful, capable, sensual, confident, fun, loving, and bright. To see that the image I had of myself focused on all the negatives and things I didn’t like or the things I felt I wasn’t, was very eye opening. Yes, all these positive things are visible to me now in a 2 minute video and a few photographs.
That one session taught me to love myself as the woman I am first and foremost because it is that woman that makes all the other roles I play each day possible. It is she who needs to shine through every role I play and hat I wear. It is she who should be my priority and I really like the woman I see when I look at those photos.
I stopped listening to what I ‘should’ think, do and feel and started paying more attention to what I actually think, do and feel. I have started trusting the woman I am; her guidance, strength and wisdom is so much greater than I ever thought and I was numbing all of that away when I listened to “them” and followed all those rules society says I need to be following.
Improving upon one part makes the whole better and the woman we are is the most important part. Honor her, take care of her and love her. Everything else will fall into place from there; business, love, parenting, marriage, friendships. It starts with you, the woman.
Kelly Grignon is a Life Balance Coach for moms that have been focused on taking care of everyone else for years, resulting in feeling over-stressed, over-tired & like they’re the one who has to do it all. Kelly helps them to reconnect with the woman they are underneath the many hats they’re wearing every day for others, get clear on what they truly desire to have/do/be in their life, and create the action plan they need with small, simple steps they can start doing TODAY to balance being mom & wife while still making time for themselves. Her greatest passion is passing on to others her belief that we do not have to wait for the kids to grow up to do the things we want, we can find our balance and live our dream life now. Kelly loves seeing her clients stand taller with self-confidence, enjoy taking care of themselves & pass on a deep love for life & it’s adventures to their kids. http://kellygrignon.com/